Hospitality

Hospitality is something I think about often. It's a Biblical concept, showing hospitality, and it's tied up with love for others. The question is, how do we do it?

I think the answer is different for different people. I think that we have different gifts, different amounts of time and money to invest, and different lives. I think, though, that we don't have an excuse for not showing hospitality at least sometimes. Still, how often and how and to whom is more of an individual concern. What I am going to tell you about are the answers I've found for myself, and what works for me.

When I became convicted that I needed to start showing hospitality, I was lost. I didn't know how and I was overwhelmed by the thought of having people over. In my mind, everything needs to be perfect, with fancy food and pretty dishes, when people come over. Still, I knew it was important and wanted to be obedient to God's commands. Finally, I found a way.

I started small and well within my comfort zone: I invited some of the children from the church over. Now, this is where the differences may come in: children may not be in your comfort zone. Still, someone must be. Start with them. For me, it was easy to have the children over to play, and it worked well for parents who like a break. In this way I was able to start getting into the habit of hospitality. From children I moved on to having some of the ladies over, then families, and then it was easier.

My main concerns about hospitality are conversation and food. To deal with the first one, I invited families so that even if we ran out of converstaion, there were always the children to talk to and about, and then I invited over people who I knew were talkers!

The food was a different issue once I moved beyond just children (who are happy with PBJs and KD). Then I remembered Faith. Faith was my pastor's wife back in Thunder Bay. Almost every Sunday they had people over after church (I know this because I lived with them for several years). Every week, Faith fed them the same meal: roast cooked with carrots and potatoes, Yorkshire pudding, salad, and dessert (granted, the dessert sometimes varied). There was no stress and no major fuss and everyone was happy.

Following her example, I usually do the same thing. I get a chicken, a bag of baby potatoes, and some variety of frozen veggies (the best part: I have an excellent recipe for chicken pie to use the left overs). Sometimes I also buy a bag of salad and make some biscuits. Dessert is likely brownies (I like brownies). That's it, and there's no stress, no major fuss, and everyone is happy.

So far as who to invite: usually I either see someone or think about someone and decide that I should invite them over. The hardest part, for me, is doing it. I worry that I'll have them over and they won't have a good time, or that they won't want to come over. I think that they're probably too busy anyway. I can come up with a million excuses for not inviting people. I really just have to do it as soon as I think it. And guess what? People come, they're not too busy (even if they're busy, we find a time that works), and we have a good time together.

To sum it all up, here are my policies for myself:
1. I need to have people over at least once a month. That's my method of making sure I don't get out of the habit of hospitality.

2. I need to just invite people over and not worry about stuff.

3. When it comes to food, I stick with what I know will turn out. If I want to try something new, I do it when it's just me and if it's good, then I might make it for someone else.

If I may add a note for parents... don't let your children think that hospitality is a burden (even if you think it is) if you want them to grow up practicing hospitality. I don't remember going to people's houses often or having people over often when growing up (except family gatherings and birthdays), but when people did come over, it was always very stressful and rarely seemed worth the effort. Relax, and if you're worried that people will judge you because your house isn't perfect or whatever, just invite over other families. The kids won't care and the parents will understand!

That's all my advice: start in your comfort zone and keep it simple (unless you're into fancy dinner parties and they make you happy; in that case go for it (and I'd like an invitation, please)).

And when I get too stressed, I remind myself that it's called "practicing" hospitality not "being an expert at" hospitality!